Social Networking – To Connect Or Not To Connect?

I had a discussion the other day with “Fred”. Recently I had sent Fred a request to connect on FaceBook. We are business associates but have only been recently introduced. Fred went on to explain to me that while he was not yet comfortable with connecting on FaceBook, he would be happy to do so on LinkedIn. FaceBook was where he conducted his personal life with friends and such. And I am …. chopped liver? As it turns out, Fred wanted to talk to me on the phone first, establish that connection, make sure that I wasn’t a serial killer (smile), and then perhaps connect on FaceBook. Honestly, that’s a great plan and one that I would strongly endorse!

Still, the question does come up.

“When somebody asks me to connect with them on (insert network name), should I or shouldn’t I accept that connection?”

Everybody has an opinion about that although few of those are strictly defined. It remains a case-by-case decision that is rarely enforced evenly. People do seem to fall into one of two camps. You have your open networkers (LinkedIn LION) and those who are a little more discriminating. Those who are choosy will often apply different permission standards to the three major networks. If we are connected via business, LinkedIn may be o.k. but. not so with FaceBook. With Twitter, for many, anything goes. Your personal strategy with social media can also influence these choices. Some folks seriously want, and need, to connect with as many people as possible. Connections are the goal as you just can’t have relationships with 25,000 followers. Please watch this South Park video before reading on …

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc4j7iMCaNY

Pretty funny, eh? Funny but, quite accurate. For those where it is a game of numbers, they play to win. If I feel that we already have a connection and you turn me down, my feelings may be hurt. If you feel obligated to connect, you may hold resentments. After all, we are dealing with people, feelings, and relationships.

This is whole issue becomes even more complicated and convoluted when dealing with Social Business and here is why …

  • Social Business suggests that we develop closer relationships with those we are connected to and those relationships often involve things of a more personal nature.
  • You want to be seen as more than a (insert business title) and, as such, that involves letting people see into your personal life. This can be also associated with transparency.
  • If you refuse a connection request from a client, do you risk alienating that individual?
  • If you request to connect with a client on say, FaceBook, might you be seen as being too pushy?
  • What happens if you allow a business connection into your social life and they then see something that conflicts with their values? Bye bye client?
  • What if you do business with the guy but you just flat out don’t like him?
  • People buy from people that they know, like, trust, and respect. Are you risking all by not expanding your relationship or are you risking it by expanding your relationship?

I don’t have any answers to this. My guess is nobody does. Each must make their own decisions. And Fred? We are now connected on LinkedIn and, guess what? He just accepted me into his inner world on FaceBook. I’m wondering what I will find. LOL

Thanks for visiting!

Craig

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Craig M. Jamieson
Craig M. Jamieson is a lifelong B2B salesperson, manager, owner, and a networking enthusiast. Adaptive Business Services provides solutions related to the sales professional. We are a Nimble CRM Solution Partner. Craig also conducts training and workshops primarily in social selling and communication skills. Craig is also the author of "The Small Business' Guide to Social CRM", now available on Amazon!
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